


How We Learned To Fly

by spacehippie



Category: How to Train Your Dragon (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Cheating, Drama, Eventual Romance, Falling In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Light Angst, Love Triangles, M/M, Romance, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-20
Updated: 2020-08-04
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:00:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 16,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21868660
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spacehippie/pseuds/spacehippie
Summary: So much changed in Hiccup's life after the Battle of the Bewilderbeast. A stranger washes ashore a few weeks later, and he may be just the thing Hiccup needs to find himself again.
Relationships: Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III/Original Male Character(s)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 51





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm new to AO3! Let me know if you think this work could use some additional tags, or if it is tagged incorrectly.

"This is Berk. A bit trampled and busted and covered in ice, but it's home. It's _our_ home. Those who attacked us are relentless, and crazy, but those who stopped them? Oh - even more so! We may be small in numbers, but we stand for something bigger than anything the world can pit against us. We are the voice of peace. And bit by bit, we will change this world. You see, we have something they don't. Oh sure, they have armies. And they have armadas. But we? We have our _Dragons._ ”

* * *

It was a dark and stormy night.

It had been only a few weeks since the Battle of the Bewilderbeast, when the armies of Drago Bludvist were narrowly beaten back by the forces of Berk. Progress on cleaning the village of icy shrapnel and repairing the buildings had been slow, frequently interrupted by mirth and celebration in honor of the new Chief. Tonight, though, Hiccup grumbled as he rolled over in bed and heard the wind howling and whipping against the walls.

_Typical Berkian weather_ , he thought, unable to sleep. Annoyance showed on his face - tomorrow morning he’d have to help survey all the damage the storm had caused an already fragile village. The night passed slowly for him, and when daybreak came the rain had stopped. He rose from bed tiredly, tried his best to enjoy breakfast, and set straight to work. What else was there to do?

“Scaffolding’s been torn up around the main hall.” Spitelout began to the Chief. The second-in-command was already waiting outside Hiccup’s front door, and he started his morning briefing without hesitation the moment Hiccup’s tired face appeared. “Three houses we were almost finished with have been badly waterlogged, and two ships i’ port were capsized.”

Hiccup nodded, pinching the bridge of his nose. “That’s a… Pretty serious couple of setbacks.” He returned defeatedly, eyes lowering slightly. “But, we’ve got nothing else to do but work through it. Right?” He sucked in a breath and pushed himself to sound optimistic, face brightening as he clapped Spitelout on the back.

“Aye, Hiccup.” He nodded. And then walked away, ready to delegate orders - but turned back at the last minute. “Oh - there’s one more thing.” He pointed a finger out to the Southern beach. “A small ship ran aground over the night. One man aboard.”

Hiccup blinked and pulled his spyglass from his hip, holding it to his eye. He saw it in the distance, perhaps eight miles away. A dinghy rigged fore-and-aft, mainmast snapped like a twig and sails in tatters, resting in the sand. A bit of concern for this newcomer wandered through his mind - strangers often didn’t understand the ways of the Berkians on their first arrival. “Uh-huh. Where is he now?”

“He was unconscious. We took him to Mother Gothi to get looked at, and he’s probably still there.”

Hiccup snapped the spyglass shut with a satisfying click and returned it to his hip. “Alright. Thanks, Spitelout. You know what to get to. I’ll… I’ll catch up with you.” He offered a bit of a smile and watched as Spitelout retreated with a reverent nod - and, once he knew he was out of earshot, Hiccup let out an enormous sigh.

Being Chief was probably exhausting if you _were_ prepared, and Hiccup wasn’t. He hadn’t given thought to his father’s lessons and advice about the proper conduct of a Chief. It had always seemed so distant, so intangible… He looked out at Berk as the morning sun began to cast its warm glimmer onto its buildings and wondered how he could have been so foolish as to really think things would last forever. He could be untethered by responsibility and commitment for all time, charting the archipelago with Toothless. He could visit his dad often and speak to him. There had been so much more for them to say to each other - so many more tiny kinks in their relationship he had wanted to iron out. There was no more time, now.

The last thing Hiccup wanted to do was help with construction. Spitelout would be directing people to scuttle the capsized ships, and bail water from the flooded houses, and construct new scaffolds around the main hall, and every second of the way decisions would have to be made, and every one would come to him. New Chief. He couldn’t take another second of it. He balled up his fists by his side - he just needed to find some time _alone_ , with Toothless. He used to have so much of it.

Looking up once more to the Southern Beach, this time without the spyglass, he saw the ex-ship as a smudge in the distance. Maybe it was lucky, for him… Out of the way of everything else. A reasonable thing for the Chief to do, to investigate. More importantly, a reasonable thing for him to do all alone.

Hiccup turned and pushed into the house again, quickly striding to Toothless. “Up, lazybones!” Hiccup smacked his friend lightly as he walked by. “Who’s a good dragon? _Who’s a good dragon?_ Oh, Thor, ‘course it’s you.” Hiccup bribed Toothless to wake up with baby talk and a small basket of trout. His friend was a lazy, lazy dragon in the mornings. Toothless flipped onto his back, green eyes lidded and an annoyed rumble coming from his mouth. A pause as Hiccup fell to his knee, puffing out his lips. “If you don’t get up, then I’ll eat _all_ this trout myself. I swear.” Hiccup pressed. Still nothing. “Alright, then. I’ll see if Stormfly wants to come with instead, I’m sure—“

Suddenly Hiccup was pummeled into the floor, wind knocked out of him by the big black reptile. “Knew you’d come around.”

It was no matter to mount Toothless and glide slowly to the beach, the dragon landing on the wet sand with a thud. Up close, the ship looked even worse. The sailor aboard had been lucky to run aground when he did - this thing wouldn’t be floating much longer in this condition. She was about three fathoms long, and one wide. Large enough for a single person to comfortably make a long journey, but not much more. Hiccup walked up to the side of the it, peg leg sinking into the sand, and ran his fingers across the runic letters chiseled roughly in the hull, digits sinking into the carvings. He felt and read the words at the same time. “THE DRY ROT”, she was called. He tilted his head and regarded it with a confused smile, laughing softly under his breath.

“This ship is called the Dry Rot, bud.” He called out, looking behind him. “What a terrible name. Like if I named you Crash-Face.” He mused, sarcastic tone creeping into his voice as it often did. And then, throwing one leg up, he clambered over the railing, gangly body flailing a bit before he found his footing on the uneven deck. Toothless trotted up curiously and watched his friend.

Cargo had been tied down to the ship - Hiccup unsheathed his dagger and cut at the ropes tying down barrels and crates, opening them up. A crate of food, cured meats and dried fruits fit for a long voyage. A crate of utilitarian clothes. So far uninteresting - he leaned his elbow against the railing and rest his cheek in his hand, looking out at Toothless. Toothless gave a rumble of approval, stretching out his wings and looking just below Hiccup.

A trapdoor in the deck Hiccup hadn’t noticed. He was standing right on top of it. “Oh, thanks bud—!” Hiccup said with surprise, stepping back from it and casting it open. The inside of the ship was dim when he climbed down - there were candles all over, but they were long since snuffed out. It was the sole sailor’s living space. A hammock, a desk, a few books and scrolls, and another chest. He heard the wind whip up a bit outside.

“Looks like we just got a wanderer, bud.” Hiccup called out. “Nothing too interesting or frightening. Haven’t seen any weapons, so we probably don’t have a big scary dragon trapper on our ha—“

Hiccup interrupted himself when he opened up the last chest, his voice trailing off on its own. He tilted his head as he looked inside. He wasn’t surprised as much as he was _confused_ , and he reached in. What was this stuff? He blinked at the first thing he picked up, turning it over in his hand. It was a flat construction of wood and fabric. There was cloth in the shape of two side by side diamonds, painted a drab orange color. Wooden rods held the shape tight. Connected to it, a spool of twine. He narrowed his eyes in wonderment and set it on the floor, returning to the chest to pull out more. One by one he pulled out dozens of artifacts and mechanisms he couldn’t fathom. None of them could serve any purpose he could understand… He took each from the ship and tossed them overboard to see them in the light. A menagerie of odd objects laid out haphazardly on the sand. Hiccup crossed his legs and sat before them, stroking his stubbled chin.

“Got any ideas, bud?” He asked, speaking up slightly to be heard over the passing wind. He was too engrossed in this new puzzle to see that Toothless, behind him, was more interested in gnawing on his own tail with his gums. The silence was all Toothless needed to speak to his rider. “Yeah, I thought so. I’m drawin’ a blank, too.” He tsked.

And he got to sit like this for a few minutes, and he thought it was lovely. He wondered for a moment how long it had been since he’d been able to stop and catch his breath like this. Days? Weeks? There was so much to process. Dad was gone. Mom was here. He was Chief. Astrid was… Astrid. Berk was in danger from increasingly powerful enemies.

The wind whipped up again, and Hiccup lifted a forearm to shield his face from it. He didn’t notice until it was too late that the item of wood and cloth, the first thing he’d seen, was whipped into the air. Toothless sat back on his haunches and followed it with his eyes but Hiccup yelped, awkwardly leaping into action to run after it. His gangly legs kicked up sand and his arms flailed as he broke into a sprint. It soared higher and higher, tumbling chaotically through the air, and the length of twine hung far below it. He could just reach out and grab it- He was just a few inches away, gaining ground - Curse his damn peg leg, sinking into the sand with his footfalls - _Gotcha!_

He held fast to the twine and felt a hard pull. But suddenly, serenity. His eyes were locked on the spot where he’d grabbed the twine, feeling the tug in his hand. Something felt different, unexpected. And Toothless, far behind, made a noise he recognized as ‘What’s that? I’m curious.’

His gaze followed the twine up, and there it was - two diamonds of orange cloth, floating on the wind, serenely bobbing side to side as gusts passed by. Vikings had no word for it, yet - it was a kite. Hiccup’s mouth fell agog for a moment, and then a vast smile spread across his face. Energy burst into his stomach and out of his voice like a beam of light.

“ _Wow!”_ He gushed, head darting between the kite and the twine in his hand, pulling it in. “Just… I-…. I just, _Wow!_ ” He buzzed and gesticulated with his free hand and turned back to the things scattered on the sand. Suddenly, they all made sense! He just had to…!

With a spring of excitement in each one of his steps, he set to work. This was no collection of random objects. This was an incredible, mobile atmospheric laboratory. He’d never seen anything like it before. The long metal spike with a curved end went through the spool, allowing him to anchor the line in the sand. The strange thing that looked like a long tube of cloth of two distinct colors clipped onto the line and could be hoisted into the air, spinning at different speeds as the wind picked up or slowed down. The two colors made it easy for him to count the revolutions in a certain time - a tiny hourglass helped with this. More and more of the objects because useful - some on the ground, some clipped to the line and hoisted into the air, and Hiccup had started taking notes on these experiments, these results, these fascinating data! He was already learning incredible things about the motions of the air, the dynamics and the shape of the wind. He’d never met this wanderer before - but suddenly, they were kindred spirits. They were learning in the same way about flight. Hiccup was doing what the wanderer had done many, many times before.

He felt free. He forgot, for a few minutes, about the terrible loads on his shoulders - of loss, of responsibility, of expectations. Toothless was right alongside him, helping how he could. He felt like he was flying again for the first time. He felt like the wind was his friend, and the sun was his guide. These objects weren’t strangers, and the air had a _soul—_

“I thought I’d find you here.”

Astrid’s voice came from behind him. She dismounted Stormfly, landing confidently onto the ground. Hiccup quickly made his excitement known. He turned on his heel, face bright, and began speaking suddenly, with great speed. “A-Astrid! You’ll never believe this!” He started, rushing to her and pointing at the diamonds in the sky. “It… It flies on its own! In the wind! I found it in the ship! There are just—! All sorts of devices here for measuring windspeed, and to see how the air moves, and to measure distances and heights with such _accuracy_! Look, look! With this - “ He reached for a tablet of runes and lines attached to a device that looked much like a spyglass - “I can measure the angle of ascent of this thing, and determine-“

“Oh, right. Nerd stuff.” Astrid teased.

Hiccup tried not to show how much that wounded him. He knew she only meant to be funny, to slow him down a little. He knew that she cared he was enjoying himself, but she didn’t care to understand why. Disappointment flickered seriously on his face for only a moment, and he pushed it away. A bit of a pause and he gingerly set down the objects he’d been handling. “…Yeah. Nerd stuff.” He responded, feigning friendliness. 

Astrid smacked his shoulder playfully. “What are you doing out here? We need someone overseeing construction.”

Hiccup nodded, having prepared his response for this exact sentence in advance. “I thought I’d come and investigate the wreckage. See if I’d find anything important.”

Astrid nodded. “Well, a relief that you didn’t.” Another look of disappointment on Hiccup’s face, that he again pushed away. Astrid noticed. “Don’t be like that, Hiccup. You know what I mean. It’s just… Whoever came ashore clearly isn’t a dragon trapper for us to be afraid of.” She gestured vaguely to the ship. She was right - it didn’t have nearly enough spikes, or shields, or intimidating paintings on it to be a trapper’s ship. There was no need to investigate closely to know that. “Now, come on. You ought to come join us.”

Hiccup looked back to the orange diamonds in the air and felt a bit sick. And then he looked to Toothless, who looked a bit disappointed at the idea of stopping, too. Responsibilities had to be tended to, though. The people of Berk were his charge. “I’ll, uh… I’ll be right out. Let me just get this stuff put away nicely. See you in twenty minutes?”

Astrid leaned forward and pecked his cheek before rollicking off. “Go, Stormfly!” was all it took to leap into the air once more with her dragon and float back to Berk.

Hiccup watched her fade into the distance for a minute, and then looked up again at the serene orange diamonds in the air. He wondered if he would ever have time to devote to this sort of thing again. He was so torn - caring deeply for his people, but caring deeply as well for the pursuit of knowledge. Understandings of nature. He had much to learn from these strange objects - he patted Toothless on the side before devoting himself to tidying up this mobile laboratory. As he worked he sighed and tried to shake the feeling, knowing this wasn't an important pursuit. The Chief had better things to be doing by far. But he couldn't shake the thought, pressing at the back of his mind, and he wouldn't shake it for days.

He mounted Toothless to return to Berk. He could learn so much more, he thought, from the wanderer.


	2. Chapter 2

As Hiccup finished the day’s work, he couldn’t shake the idea he felt he was lying to Astrid. No one else would have considered it lying, of course - but he felt it nonetheless, and the sense of dishonesty made him guilty when she would come to check on him or place a quick kiss on his cheek. He knew he _had_ to be Chief - he cared for his people. But he knew that what was best for himself and for others didn’t have to be the thing he enjoyed most. Maybe she would be upset if he knew how conflicted he was. Maybe she wouldn’t care. He didn’t know. But he still kept these feelings staunchly to himself, which only made him more guilty about them.

The first bit of work was to continue repairs on the roof of the Great Hall. Hiccup was directly involved - his duty as Chief. Gathering spare planks and tying them off, nailing them together, erecting tall and spindly scaffolding structures that let Vikings work on fixing everything. He wasn’t alone - Astrid was helping as well, using Stormfly to ferry crates of materials around the worksite. Snotlout, for his strength, had been ‘delighted’ to help with some heavy lifting of his own (or at least, he claimed to be ‘delighted’ to help after a ten-minute intimidation session from Astrid).

“Astrid?” Snotlout asked Hiccup, ferrying two buckets up to the roof.

“You need to add a few more words before that turns into a question, Snotlout.” Hiccup sassed without looking up from his work. He was nailing shingles to the roof, one iron nail between his teeth, which made his voice awfully muddled.

“I mean, you better lock that down soon, Hiccup. Now that you’re chief.“ Snotlout said haughtily, starting to clamber back to his ladder. Hiccup took offense.

“Snotlout, I don’t think it’s any of your business.” Hiccup said, still focusing on his hands.

“If I had a girl that pretty under my arm? There wouldn’t be all this hesitating I see you do. Oh, I’d be having my _WAY_ with her!”

Hiccup knew that often the key to a good day was to ignore Snotlout, so he did just that.

“Have you thought about how many kids you’re gonna have? What you’re gonna name them?”

And suddenly Hiccup was filled with a revulsion that he couldn’t quite understand - and then, an all-encompassing guilt for it. Why should he be so uncomfortable thinking about that? It was only the natural thing to do next. Oh, _gods_ , that’s why he was so upset. He’d chosen her when he was fourteen - and here he was, six years later, wondering how well they really got along. When he was fourteen, he’d thought she was strong, cute. She still was. But he hadn’t considered spending his _life_ with her. Having kids with her and being Chief.

“Shut up, Snotlout.” Hiccup said weakly. Snotlout had struck a nerve Hiccup wasn’t ready to let anyone see.

“Have you guys done it yet?”

In surprise, Hiccup’s hand slipped. His hammer came down roughly on his right thumb rather than its intended target and he took Thor’s name in vain loudly, which finally gave Snotlout the cue he needed to zip it and leave Hiccup alone.

“Right, you have fun, Hiccup, good luck!” Snotlout reeled, and then disappeared down the ladder. Hiccup groaned, clutching his hand and cursing again. Snotlout was a _jerk_.

It hurt a lot. Many other Vikings, rife with ripping muscles and a surprising amount of insecurity, would have shrugged it off but Hiccup was more concerned. And so, with care, he excused himself from the construction site and made his way to Mother Gothi’s, clutching his hand and wincing all the way. He reached up to rap on her door - and then, realizing his mistake, used his noninjured hand instead. Mother Gothi hobbled slowly to the door and smiled amiably when she saw Hiccup.

“H-Hi, Gothi. I hit my thumb with a hammer.” He said embarrassedly, holding up his injury with an annoyed face. “Can I come in?”

Hiccup looked down and watched Gothi nod with closed eyes before walking back inside. Her home was also her apothecary and infirmary - the living area sported a grand fireplace, currently dead, and six individual beds. She beelined for the vast selection of potted plants and herbs growing by the window, starting to pluck some with wrinkled hands and drop them into her mortar and pestle. Hiccup let the door close behind him and he looked down at his thumb again. Oh, Gods. In the time he’d taken to walk here, he realized, it had started bleeding. This was all stupid Snotlout’s fault… He rolled his eyes in annoyance and swore again.

“Language.”

Hiccup looked up suddenly. He’d assumed he would be alone with Gothi, and he didn’t recognize the voice - _Oh, of course!_

The beached sailor was sitting up in one of the beds. He was tall - so tall that he probably would only barely fit in the bed if he laid himself down. Over six feet tall, with dirty blond hair and dull blue eyes, a square jaw and a round chin. He was holding a mug of some hot drink in his hand - Hiccup recognized it as wake-up juice, something Gothi made for the sick shortly after they awoke from long slumbers. This sailor had probably only gotten up ten or twenty minutes ago.

“She doesn’t talk much, does she?” He added, gesturing to Gothi and noticing Hiccup’s silence. The Chief smiled widely to make a good impression.

“Oh, no, she doesn’t! This is Mother Gothi, our apothecary. And… I heard of you. Your ship beached here last night. Are you okay?”

The stranger nodded, taking another sip from his mug. “Harald Rjagvir.” He said. ‘Harald’ had two long ‘A’s, which rather made the speaker ready to yawn after saying the name aloud. And ‘Rjagvir’ sounded quite unlike anything that was supposed to be spoken by a human. “I think I’m really, really tired. But nothing hurts.”

Hiccup quite enjoyed this. Living on a small, isolated island, meeting people was a rare occurrence. He could probably count on two hands the amount of times he actually remembered having the ‘hello, my name is’ conversation with someone. “Uh… Good to hear. I’m Hiccup.” He nodded. “Your ship’s in bad shape.”

The sailor suddenly tensed up, sporting wide eyes. “Is she lost?” He urged quickly. “The cargo? Everything aboard, is it alright?”

Hiccup raised his eyebrows. He’d completely forgot about his pained thumb, but by now Gothi was returning with his pain remedy. “Actually, Harald, everything on board was fine. I had a look at it myself, and I was… Very impressed.” Gothi handed Hiccup a small vial of liquid. Hiccup was about to gulp it down when she grabbed his wrist and shook her head. She tsked, dousing a small cloth in the vial’s contents and wrapping it around his thumb. Alright, good call.

“You were ‘impressed’?” Harald asked skeptically. His voice was deep and masculine - a little strange, coming from someone with an effeminate, thin frame. “…Thanks, I guess. And thanks for taking care of me. Could have been a goner on the beach, and instead I’m here, so I’m… Really grateful.” Harald smiled up at Hiccup. Hiccup found, suddenly, that he rather liked watching this stranger smile.

“You should be thanking Gothi, not me. And it’s our pleasure. Berk’s prosperity is everyone’s prosperity.” Hiccup responded happily. And then, his heart swelled with a bit of pride at his last sentence - he rather liked that. He liked that, as Chief, he got to stand for something he cared for.

And then friendly conversation continued for a few more minutes. Hiccup didn’t like it terribly much - it was the same sort of conversation one usually had with people they barely knew, but they got the big details out of the way. Hiccup was Chief of Berk, and dragons were friends here. (And everywhere else, but people didn’t know it). Harald was a nomad from the far South, twenty-two years old with only the Dry Rot to his name.

“And… That doesn’t tell me… I’ve just been so curious about your cargo.” Hiccup said. By now, he’d gotten himself sitting at the end of Harald’s bed.

“Oh, yeah! You said you were impressed. Very nice of you. I-“

“You do… Like, you have an inclinometer in there? And a thing with cups that can measure airspeed and a—“

Harald laughed, eyes starting to shine. Like Hiccup, he’d been raised around Vikings with little respect for intellectual pursuit. “Yeah, yeah, the works. Made it all myself, and I bring it everywhere. It’s loads of fun to make kites, do it whenever I get spare cloth.”

Hiccup just let out an exasperated ‘wow’ and his body loosened further. “Really great work, Harald. I’ll have to talk to you more about it. But… As it is, I got to, uh…”

Hiccup considered that he had to leave, and return to work. Chiefly duties. But here was someone he felt a closeness to he couldn’t explain. It was a strange feeling, that morning, to have been handling Harald’s objects and known exactly what to do with them. How to use them.

“Got stuff to do?” Harald encouraged calmly. Now done with his drink, he set it on the table beside his bed.

“Yeah… But, I’ll see you around. Right, Harald?” Hiccup said warmly. It wasn’t what he’d expected to say. Harald was supposed to be a foreigner. A passer-by that Berk would tend back to health and let him back out into the world. This wasn’t supposed to be a ‘see you around’ sort of person, it was supposed to be a ‘nice to meet you’ person. But Hiccup couldn’t bring him to imply that they’d never speak again. He rather liked having someone new, here.

Hiccup left. The door opened to a glimmering Berkian sun. Even though it was far over the horizon, Hiccup couldn't shake the sensation that the it had only just risen on a brand new day.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter comes after a minor edit to the end of Chapter 2. Happy New Year!

Hiccup sat at the end of his bed two days later. It was probably well past midnight. His body was limp, his eyes dry with exhaustion on a pale face. He needed a break. He needed a break so _badly_. Being in charge of Berk was nothing like being in charge of the Edge. It was so much bigger. There were so many more people, and he held such deep concern in his heart for the wellbeing of every single one of them.

Including Astrid.

And, as he stared ahead, so exhausted he couldn’t emote or move so much as an inch, he was pondering whether or not he loved her. He was pondering how badly it would kill both of them if he had to let her down. How badly it would kill everyone who was so confident the future Chieftess had already been secured.

Toothless, sitting on his haunches right next to his best friend, had a look of concern that was growing by the moment. He nudged his Hiccup urgently. Thoughts didn’t pass through a dragon’s mind in the same way as they did a Viking’s, but the concepts of _concern_ and _sickness_ were the ones he was preoccupied with as he warbled uncertainly into the air. He was waiting impatiently for a pat on the head, a reassuring “Hey, bud” or even a smile. Nothing came for many long minutes.

_Snap out of it!_

Toothless reared onto his hind legs and roared loudly at Hiccup, furious at his stoicism. Tired of begging for a reaction, he’d force one out.

Hiccup finally looked up, clambering backwards on the bed in surprise before Toothless flopped back down onto the wood floor with a loud, fleshy thud.

“Thor alive, what’s gotten into you, Toothless?” Hiccup scolded, grabbing Toothless’ head firmly between his hands. It took him a moment to realize that _he_ was the one who needed to consider his behavior. He loosened up suddenly, a loud groan escaping his throat.

“I’m sorry, bud. I need to talk to someone about… All this. Don’t I?” He started scratching Toothless under the chin, something he knew his friend enjoyed. Toothless responded in kind, playfully bringing up a scaly paw to bat at Hiccup’s torso. Hiccup finally let out a laugh, the first Toothless had heard from him in days. “You’ve always been a great listener, bud.” He said, his voice more hoarse, gravelly, and sincerely thankful.

Toothless batted him again. Impatiently. Trying to say something.

“I should… Probably talk to someone who can talk back, though.” Hiccup cocked an eyebrow, hazarding a guess. Toothless seemed pleased with those words.

“But who, Toothless?” Hiccup wailed desperately, falling back onto the bed. “Everyone needs to be confident in my ability as Chief. And if everyone knows I’m… I’m having all this trouble? And every, _every_ Berkian wants this to work out between me and Astrid so badl-“

Hiccup stopped himself, biting his lip and feeling a twang of guilt. He was _hoping_ to talk to someone that wouldn’t change his mind. Someone that would encourage him to find peace apart from Astrid. He felt so selfish. She’d never done anything to wrong him.

There was only one person he could talk to. It was painfully stupid to do so, but he knew he wanted to - and he’d been flirting with the idea in his mind for hours. There was only one person on Berk who didn’t have any prior feelings about him and Astrid marrying, and he was bedridden at Mother Gothi’s.

“I’ll be back soon, bud.” Hiccup rose from the bed on wobbly legs, locking his peg leg in place. “Thanks for reminding me, bud. Reminding me that I needed to get some help.” He whispered. Toothless happily toddled up and Hiccup wrapped his arms tightly around his dragon, holding him close.

It was only a quarter of an hour later that Hiccup found himself sitting on the floor in the middle of Mother Gothi’s infirmary. It was dark in the night. Harald was sleeping, so no candles were lit, and the place was dark and devoid of color. Only vague shapes made themselves known to Hiccup. He had recognized Harald’s bed by the sound of quiet snores coming from it. Now, though, he stuffed his head into his palm angrily.

“This is so ridiculous.” He murmured to himself - but also just barely hoping Harald was listening in his sleep. Somehow. “I don’t even know you. And I didn’t even wait until morning to come here. Why would you care about my problems?”

He let moments pass in silence, and he could sense the strange way that time passed in the wee hours of the night. Dreamlike because of exhaustion, and because of the strange and immaterial way things looked in the deep blackness. Perhaps Hiccup would suddenly awaken in bed and realize it had all been a fantasy of the night.

“I’m a very light sleeper.”

Hiccup winced the moment he heard Harald speak, immediately regretting himself. Maybe he could slink out the door and act like he hadn’t been here. Or say he was here for something else.

“I’m also a good listener.”

Harald hadn’t moved a bit. He was still lying placidly on his side as though asleep, and his eyes were still closed. Hiccup was jealous of how relaxed he seemed.

“And I’m an idiot for coming here.” Hiccup spat, unable to stop the words coming out.

“No.” Harald sat up in bed, stretching out like a cat and making strange mewling noises. “I think you sound pissed off, and you’re an idiot for thinking I’m the only person you can talk to.”

A pause. Hiccup’s breath hitched with anticipation.

“I’m sure there are people _here_ who love you, Hiccup. Who are ready to listen.” He swiped at his eyes and leaned against the bed’s headboard, blinking back sleep.

“You said you were a good listener.” Hiccup countered, again speaking before he thought. He couldn’t make out all of Harald’s facial expression in the darkness, but he heard the wanderer heave out a breath like a chuckle, and it encouraged him to continue. “I don’t think any of them should hear what I have to say.”

“Sounds serious.” Harald stifled a yawn, working not to give the impression he was disinterested. “Go ahead, pal.”

Hiccup started with his discomfort as Chief. He had been dreaming of spending the rest of his life exploring the Archipelago, free on the back of his dragon and seeking truths about the world with his best friend, untethered from anything. He had a responsibility, though, to his people. He was guilty that he wondered how things might have been had he chosen differently.

“I had to make a similar decision, actually.” Harald said bitterly, looking out into the dark distance. “I had to choose between my responsibilities, and… Running away from them.” He admitted. Hiccup realized he’d struck one of Harald’s heartstrings in a sensitive place and quieted himself.

“What did you do?” Hiccup whispered, moving closer, starving for answers.

“What do you think? We’re different. I decided to run away and explore. You decided to stay.”

Hiccup was pensive. “Do you regret it, too?”

It was Harald’s turn to be wracked with guilt. He clutched his chest in the darkness and seethed a breath through his teeth. “Every damn day, Hiccup. You’re so much braver than I was.”

Hiccup didn’t want to ask Harald for more detail. It was clearly a sensitive topic. And now, both men were simmering in their personal failings and discomforts. Hiccup felt more naked before him than he’d been to any Berkian in years.

“That’s not what I expected you to start talking about, actually.” Harald piped up, resetting his tone to a polite one. “It sounded to me like you were going to talk about a girl.”

Hiccup was now kneeling on the floor, face-to-face with Harald, who sat on his bed with crossed arms. Catharsis. The Chief felt an incredible amount of relief to have spoken with someone, _anyone_ , about what was on his mind… He had come to talk about Astrid initially, but now something had changed. Now she was the _last_ thing he wanted to think about. He said something that filled him equally with an unbelievable thrill and an unbelievable shame.

“What if she wasn’t important?” He said. He placed his hand on Harald’s forearm. How long had his heart been racing? How long had he been staring through the darkness at the barely-visible gray eyes of his… ‘new friend’? How long had his hands been trembling? There was a long, pregnant silence.

“Am _I_ important?” came Harald.

“Maybe you are.” came Hiccup.

There was another desperately long silence. Hiccup’s throat was dry, and he found himself thankful for that - rather than a whimper, all that sounded from his throat was a quiet breath. Despite the late hour, both Vikings had now been filled with adrenaline, sparks of electricity bouncing up and down their spines. Harald swallowed. He was unsure of all the details, but knew he was coming close to treading on difficult territory.

Harald wanted to protest. He wanted to say, “I shouldn’t get into something complicated” - but he couldn’t summon the will to speak. If he did, he wouldn’t get to see where this was going, and he desperately wanted to. The life of a nomad was a lonely one. Instead of speaking, then, he just watched as Hiccup’s delicate fingers traced up his forearm to his shoulder, finding places to prod and squeeze lightly. It was so late. Both were so tired and touch-starved in their own way and the air was tingling with energy. Mistakes would be made.

“Gothi says I’m ready to get up and about… I want to… Meet you by the Dry Rot tomorrow. Tomorrow morning.” Harald said nervously. “You asked about my cargo. I’ll tell you more about it. For now… I want to sleep.”

Hiccup felt thrill fill his chest. But how could he get a minute to himself? “I’ll… I’ll do what I can for you, Harald.” He murmured. “See you there.”

And then, there was a long pause. Both felt like they should part with something. But not a handshake - that seemed too little. But not a hug - that seemed too much. Hiccup’s hand drifted off of Harald’s shoulder and he backed away, walking to the door and stumbling without turning around. He half-fell out of it into the night and realized how hard he was panting.

Neither could see it in the deep darkness, but both were smiling with excitement.


	4. Chapter 4

Hiccup wandered slowly to the beach just as the sun rose, dismounting his trusty dragon, who was growling tiredly. There, still lying on its side, the wanderer’s ship. No sign of Harald. Hiccup stroked Toothless thankfully, looking at the scene - waves crashed on the shore, lapping at the sand. He wondered if, maybe, he’d dreamed his encounter last night. It would have made sense. How could he do something so ridiculous? They hadn’t explicitly said anything… _Too_ untoward to each other. Hiccup could find a way to recite the words to Astrid and make it sound innocent _enough_. But had she been there to feel the tremulous air between the two men…. Had she been there to watch the way they had touched each other and gazed into each other’s eyes through the inky black of night, she would surely have objected.

Hiccup had been wandering towards the Dry Rot, eyes glassed over and distracted with these thoughts. He came up and pressed a calloused hand to the ships’ beam just as Harald appeared.

“She needs a new mast.” He quipped, appearing from below deck, a flash of dirty blond hair the first Hiccup saw of him. “I’ll have to look around Berk for a suitable tree.” He continued. He carried with him lashings of rope, which he quickly used to make repairs to the rigging. He noticed Hiccup’s presence, but didn’t make eye contact yet, acting busy as a bee. “And… Also a new sail. Only a few dozen yards of cloth. It’d be a big help.”

Hiccup laughed, stepping back in the sand, looking up at him. “Man, you scared me. I didn’t think you were here.” He beamed. Far behind, Toothless had begun running in wild circles around a particularly interesting piece of driftwood, poking his snout at it skeptically. Harald looked up -

And promptly fell back, eyes wide with shock as he saw a Night Fury only a few dozen paces away. He scrambled backward and screamed, slamming into the railing and tumbling over the side, falling into the sand and feeling the wind knocked out of him.

“You-! Oh-! You alright?” Hiccup circled round to get close, troubled a bit by his prosthetic sinking into the sand. Harald was on his back, in a gray tunic and black trousers. “Jeez, surely you’d seen a dragon by now?” The chief exclaimed in surprise, reaching out a hand to help him up. The wanderer took it gratefully.

“Thor! A few terrible terrors and stuff. And from far away. That’s a…” As he wobbled onto his feet, Toothless came around as well to see what the fuss was about. Big, curious green eyes poking toward the two. “That’s a whole Night Fury. Right in front of my eyes. Plain as day.” Harald finally managed, breathlessly.

Hiccup grinned proudly - and he could tell Toothless was doing his best to show off a bit, too, strutting a little more regally than usual as he closed in on the sailor to give him a ‘hello’ sniff. Toothless thought the stranger smelled awfully of spices and the sea spray.

“Well, go on.” Hiccup encouraged. Harald had stayed fairly still as Toothless came close to inspect him, as though a foul movement might spook him into a frenzy. “Give him a pat. He won’t hurt you.” He said. His words were gentle. He understood the fear strangers from Berk had of dragons.

And Harald did just that. He reached out and palmed Toothless’ snout, finding the dragon closed the distance as his hand got close. The flesh was rough and leathery but warm. Comfortable, and soft underneath the surface. Hiccup admired the look of wonder on Harald’s face. His steely blue eyes were wide and shining with curiosity.

“I like to think about the things we think are different.” Harald said, apparently a non sequitur as he started to delicately stroke at different parts of Toothless, testing for what the dragon most wanted him to scratch at. Harald could tell this thing wasn’t a pet - it was a _person_ , with just as much sapience as him and just as much need for respect.

“…What?”

“I mean… The people of my tribe were always afraid of outsiders, of all kinds. People who were different. Spoke different languages, or had different ways, you know?” Harald looked up. “I didn’t believe that. I know that things we don’t understand aren’t always things we have to be afraid of. I just… Had never thought that _dragons_ would be like that.”

A silence hung in the air for a few moments and Hiccup found he rather enjoyed the sentiment. Toothless had taken a liking to the new one, making happy gurgling noises as he bared the underbelly of his neck for scratches. And oh, did that hit the spot.

“You named him Toothless?” Harald asked.

Hiccup nodded.

“Even though he clearly has teeth.” He tugged open the reptile’s mouth with little difficulty.

“You named your ship the Dry Rot,” Hiccup countered, “Even though the wood is clearly brand new.”

And the two shared a moment of silence, and it didn’t feel altogether uncomfortable.

“Anyway, he doesn’t have them all the time. Show ‘im, bud.”. And with that, Toothless proudly demonstrated how his teeth retracted seamlessly into his gums.

“That’s _really_ gross.” Harald didn’t miss a beat.

Most of the next hour was spent on conversation. Harald had promised to show Hiccup more equipment, and he did just that. The more they spoke, the more they realized they had more to say. The conversation flowed so easily between them that they began to wonder if it would ever begin to run dry. They spoke of their love for the air, and Hiccup even teased some more of Harald’s history from him. Looking upon Harald’s collection of kites, weighed down with sand, Hiccup finally leaned on Harald’s shoulder.

“You’ve never been up there, though, have you?” He grinned widely.

Harald felt his heart skip a beat. Or was it two? Or five? He began to babble, trying to find words to articulate _something_ , but he was so surprised by the idea that five or ten ideas tried to push themselves out of his mouth all at once and he sounded like he’d forgotten how to speak. Hiccup shushed him playfully, a wide grin on his face. He actually reached forward and _pressed_ his index finger to Harald’s lips to quiet them - a gesture that was intimate enough it should have given him pause.

“Climb aboard.” Hiccup said simply, mounting Toothless first. One leg over the other, climbing atop Toothless’ saddle. He patted the spot right behind him and Harald looked dizzy.

“…I couldn’t possibly. That’s… There’s no way I…” Harald was trying to think of some excuse not to go. It was his life’s dream. What if it didn’t turn out to be as perfect as he wanted it to be? What if —

“ _Do it for me_.” Hiccup said, reaching out a hand.

Harald was unable to refuse. He was unable to refuse that request, coming from that tremulous and awkward voice that danced on the wind as the waves crashed nearby. He stepped forward tentatively - and then again, wondering if his feet were sinking into the sand or if he was walking on clouds or if he was completely floating into place behind Hiccup. He didn’t ask how to sit on the saddle behind him. He _knew_ , in his heart - in the way that a fish knew how to swim - that he had to bring himself as close as he could. He had to wrap his arms around the Chief. He swallowed nervously.

“Will it hurt?” He asked. He winced with embarrassment, realizing the question was ridiculous - and yet, it was still one he wanted to ask.

“No.” Hiccup encouraged, not seeming to find the question odd at all.

It was hard to pin down exactly when Toothless leapt into the air. Finding oneself in the air was unlike finding oneself at home, or in the water, or on a boat or under the stars. Finding oneself in the air was finding oneself noplace at all, but floating in the boundless expanse that none ever considered explorable. One wonders how to navigate a difficult mountainous pass, or a forest, or a town. None consider how to navigate the air. It is simply _there_. So it was in this way that Harald felt altogether different about flying through drab blue sky, clutching the Chief of Berk in front of him, watching the sea far below.

“I… I never thought I’d see anything from so far up!” Harald exclaimed, wind whipping past the two. From the ground, Toothless’ wide black wings were a beautiful scratch in the cloudy Berkian sky, drifting along as dragon and Viking helped each other in an intricate discussion about where to go. About how to turn, what air currents to catch, and where to go next. Hiccup did not pilot Toothless any more than Toothless piloted Hiccup - nor were they one and the same. They were two, and both were required to soar.

Harald felt honored to be a part of such a thrilling experience.

There was no conversation, because none was needed. There was lots of excited whooping and screaming, though, from both of the men on Toothless’ back. Smiles were painted so widely on both faces, excitement and adrenaline rushing through veins just as quickly as Toothless rushed through the air. The dragon came down for an impressive landing once more by the Dry Rot, kicking up clouds of sand and dirt ahead of him.

Harald rolled off the dragon immediately, his whole body buzzing with excitement. Hiccup was laughing hysterically - it had been a long time since he’d seen someone so excited to fly, and he empathetically enjoyed Harald’s laughter.

Harald lay on the sand and looked up at the sky, thinking it looked entirely different than it had before - and wondering if he was buzzing because of the flight, or if he was buzzing because he had gotten to hold such a fascinating man in his arms.

* * *

That night was one Hiccup had been looking forward to. Following his morning adventure with Harald, the day’s work seemed so much easier - and now, the sun set as he stood at the docks.

“A pleasure to meet you in person.” Hiccup bowed at the waist, showing his deference.

“I’m sure.” The man across from him responded gruffly.

“I’m… It’s great to represent Berk. We’ve done enough of these negotiations in writing, it’s time to make sure we… Uh…” Hiccup straightened his back again and was quite annoyed by how unenthused his fellow Chief was - “It’s time to make sure we secure peace in our lifetimes.”

Chief Runo was in his sixties, but looked hale and strong. He was the Viking in charge of the distant Stormbreaker clan. Berkians and Stormbreakers had warred during Hiccup’s early childhood, but Stoick had put an end to these hostilities shortly before Hiccup had turned twelve. The two were, then, united against the dragon menace. Though the clans had not spilled each other’s blood in years, there was no official word that wars between them would be at an end. Hiccup had endeavored to change that, in letters conversing about terms for a treaty between their peoples. He was proud of his progress, and rightly so. Now, Runo stood on the Berkian docks - the beached Dry Rot visible far down the shore - and looked down at Hiccup skeptically.Hiccup was dressed in the Viking equivalent of formal wear. A crown of mistletoe sat around his messy brunet hair and a dark brown fur-trimmed cloak was draped around his shoulders. Runo was dressed much the same, but he seemed twice Hiccup’s size, and brandished an axe at his side and a black leather jerkin on his chest.

Conversation in the Great Hall was not bright and light-hearted, but diplomatic. Hiccup rather enjoyed the _idea_ of diplomacy, but actually enacting it with other Vikings was difficult. They were all so damn _stubborn_. It took time, but soon all found out that they wanted peace, and Berk had the answer. Papers were strewn all about the tables, candlelight flickering and allowing Hiccup and Runo to barely make out the runic text of the agreement - dozens and dozens of pages long. This was to be Hiccup’s first grand achievement as Chief. He only mourned that it was meant to be his father’s.

“This agreement’s good.” Runo said gruffly, sounding impressed. Perhaps blood and plunder were not the most important things in life, if he could get along with the Berkians. The two tribes could make use of one another - it came to him as a surprise. “…Can I ask for one more addition before we sign, Hiccup?” He asked after a pause, tilting his head contemplatively, mulling something over carefully.

“Of course, Chief Runo.” Hiccup responded eagerly.

Runo started slowly. He sounded awfully discomforted by something. “Well… I am very sorry about the passing of your father, Hiccup. Stoick, I mean.” He said after a long pause, words coming out slowly. Runo was not a man well-versed in the way of feelings - it was a subject he found difficult to broach. Hiccup felt a pang of sorrow, but he had expected those sort of words to come soon.

“Y-yes, Chief Runo. Thank you for saying so.” Hiccup said, looking away.

“But that’s just the thing. Like the agreement, Hiccup, I do. An’ even though it’s ridiculous to think… Even though I shouldn’t have to spell it out, I just want to be sure of things. I’m sure you’ll agree to this change of mine in a heartbeat.” He shrugged. Hiccup was now becoming rather annoyed that Runo was taking so long to spell this out, but he didn’t let it show on his face. Instead he leaned in and raised his eyebrows to look friendly and interested.

“God forbid something happen to you, Hiccup, I’d just want to make sure Berk has an heir of _your_ bloodline. What would respect this agreement, seeing as it came from their father.”

Hiccup didn’t understand, and the candles continued to burn around them. The great hall was still.

“I’m saying, Hiccup, you have a treaty as long as you and Astrid are married in a month’s time.”


	5. Chapter 5

One month.

Hiccup signed the agreement. Why shouldn’t he? Any ‘strange sensations’ he had towards the wanderer who’d come to the Berkian shore recently were improper from the start. He was in a committed relationship with Astrid. In truth, he barely knew who this ‘Harald’ was - and as he brought ink to parchment and etched the angular, jagged edges of his runic name into the agreement, he imagined the Berkian blood that could be spilt should he refuse. The diplomatic event was over, but Hiccup’s hands trembled. He looked up to Runo, and brought the meeting to an end hurriedly. Hiccup spoke tactfully and politically. He partook in the ceremonial trading of weapons with Runo and he shook hands firmly - but from the moment that his name had landed on the treaty he felt as though he’d begun to hold his breath. It made his insides burn. He felt vividly, in his mind, an hourglass beginning to mark the time slipping away until he would suffocate.

_He would suffocate in one month._

And then, the two leaders strode from the Great Hall to a small crowd. Astrid, Valka, and the village elders had been waiting patiently outside, eager for the meeting to reach its end - eager to know of Berk’s near future. They talked amongst themselves to pass the time, but once Hiccup and Runo appeared they looked on in anticipation. They stared at the chiefs, waiting for them to break the silence. Runo, in one swift motion, grabbed Hiccup’s hand and held it high in the air.

“Hooligans and Stormbreakers will have peace!” He announced powerfully. The crowd let out a collective sigh of relief, mostly turning to each other and smiling and commenting quietly on the development. Astrid rushed up to Hiccup and scooped him up in her arms, a wide and proud smile on her lips.

“I knew you could do it, babe!” She smiled, squeezing him tight with one arm and lightly tugging his brunet braids with the other. She went in for a kiss - Hiccup accepted it with as much eagerness as he could muster. And then, Runo piped up from behind. Hiccup turned white.

“Don’t you have something to say to your beloved, Hiccup?” He chided, crossing his arms.

Oh, God. There was no way out. Hiccup looked out at his closest friends watching. Runo, right behind. Astrid, inches away and looking at him with love, stroking wisps of hair from his face. His mind rushed to find an answer. Maybe if he thought hard enough, something would present itself. The perfect combination of words to get him out of this. None came.

With a heavy heart, he realized that this was what adults did. Adults did what they _had_ to do, and not what they _wanted_ to do. And… Perhaps his time with Harald had been a disturbed, passing fantasy. A moment’s lapse in judgement that was to be forgotten about. Any trepidation he had about Astrid was surely, _surely_ going to pass any day now. He swallowed and forced a smile onto his face, digging up his favorite memories of Astrid. Their first kiss. Their time under the moon, and their time shared walking the forest…

“I… I wanted to be more romantic about it. You know. Because - because I’m the romantic type.” Hiccup leaned in. But then, perhaps this was romantic enough. He was dressed so regally - Astrid thought him more handsome than anyone else on Berk - and their friends and family were already gathered. “Astrid…”

And he fell to his knee. He reached to his pocket - he had forged the ring even before their first kiss, and Valka encouraged him to carry it at all times. Silver, with a beautiful green emerald inlaid in the center - exactly the same hue as his eyes. The carvings around the side were intricate celtic knots. Astrid flushed bright red, and those watching began to titter with delight.

“Astrid Hofferson, will you marry me?” Hiccup smiled up at her.

There was a collective cheer as she said yes, emphatically, tearfully, and lurched forward to kiss him again. They fell together, arms warmly embracing each other as those watching broke into a joyed applause. Hiccup felt her close - she was warm. Welcoming. He knew her so well. They had known each other since childhood, and forged their relationship in a terrifying adventure… Why was he being so picky? Why couldn’t he just love her and make his life easier? Maybe, if he pretended to love her, he would start to once more.

* * *

“Good news about the treaty, Chief.” Astrid said affably, bending a bit at the hip respectfully. She’d never met the Chief of another tribe before, and she intended to make a good impression.

The reception had been planned to celebrate a treaty well negotiated - and so was only expected to cater to the politically minded Vikings of Berk -but now it doubled as an engagement party, so almost all the citizens of the small archipelago were in attendance. As a result, the food had run out quickly (mostly owing to the Thorston twins’ insatiable appetite) but there was always, always, _always_ enough mead to go around. It took place outside, under the starry sky, in a cleared-out space of green grass illuminated by dozens of glowing torches that made the partygoers and dancers look somehow ethereal and half-present, like they may vanish into thin air at any moment only to reappear a few moments later.

“And good news about your engagement, young lady.” Runo nodded back, holding up his tankard politely. “You and Chief Hiccup seem great for each other.”

“Guess I’m just lucky…” She quieted down, eyes darting around furtively for a moment to make sure Hiccup wasn’t in earshot before she leaned in to whisper to Runo - “Between you and me, I think I oughta thank you. Hiccup needed an excuse to stop dragging his feet and _commit_ already.” She rolled her eyes. The fact that Hiccup’s proposal was part of the treaty had been only a half-secret.

Suddenly, to Astrid’s surprise, Runo joined her in acting secretive. Astrid had intended to gossip in a friendly manner - made easier by the fact that she was a little tipsy - but now Runo looked ready to share some truly important secret. He stepped closer, voice falling to a whisper.

“I think I should tell you, young lady, exactly _why_ I think he’s had trouble committin’ before now.” He murmured. Astrid was visibly disturbed that Runo - who’d only met Hiccup in person today - could possibly know something so intimate. She didn’t object aloud - she waited for more words, blinking silently with a frown.

“If I could start at the beginning,” - Runo coughed, wiping his mouth and downing a hefty swig of mead - “We actually arrived here this morning, but the winds were no good for us to approach the docks. We spent a few of the wee hours of the day just watchin’ Berk from afar, unable to get any closer. Well, I spent a fair bit of time watching through the spyglass.”

Astrid listened intently, looking unsure.

“I saw Hiccup rode his dragon with some… Man, this morning?”

The future chieftess wavered slightly before shaking her head. “… I didn’t know.” She said, face darkening. She was the type to punch a misbehaving boyfriend - no, fiancee - in the teeth. Hiccup had told her he was going to sleep in this morning. Why did he lie to her?

Runo saw the restrained fury on her face and raised his hands quickly, accidentally letting some mead slosh out of his tankard and onto the grass. “I don’t mean to say anythin’ bad. But the two looked fond of each other.” He said distantly, “An’ I really do just want Berk to have an heir. And there can’t be much of an heir if Hiccup gets with… Well…”

“Another _man?_ ” Astrid interrupted loudly, hands on hips, disgust dripping from her voice.

Runo interrupted again. “Young lady, there’s no need for us to jump to conclusions. I’m just saying… Well… Let me find the one Hiccup was with and bring him back home with us. We’ll make sure he doesn’t bother your betrothed anymore. Sound alright?”

Astrid crossed an arm and cocked an eyebrow, stuffing her chin into her chest. “You don’t need to ask _me_ permission.” She said testily.

Runo nodded. “Ah, yes, I know, I know. I just thought it would be best for me to tell you everything. For you to _know_ what your man might not have told you.”

There was a hesitation, torchlight flickering in Astrid’s eyes, and she looked up at Runo thankfully. A moment of sobriety passed her and she relaxed, realizing - past her annoyance towards Hiccup - that she ought to be very thankful of this foreign chief. Runo was an _incredibly_ persuasive man - one of the reasons Hiccup found it so difficult to negotiate with him. All he’d said was that Hiccup rode his dragon with some man. This shouldn’t have been enough to make Astrid jealous, but Runo used his tone expertly. Twisted his voice around and emphasized the right words, grinned under his breath as he manipulated her feelings.

He didn't want anything getting in the way. There was a chance, however slim, that this person who he'd seen riding with Hiccup would be a problem. He'd seen them holding each other. Laughing rapturously, joy on their faces... He'd seen them share some spark that he couldn't define. There would be an issue if Hiccup wandered from Astrid. There would be an issue if, in the throes of the many conflicts Runo knew were sure to come, Berk was left without an heir. 

It would be dangerous, Runo thought, if his son were to fall in love with Chief Hiccup.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter again comes with a small edit to the end of the previous one. Happy late birthday, Hiccup!

“Your son’s a flighty one.”

Runo’s advisor was a tall woman of twenty-five years, with a surprisingly frail-looking body.

“He’s a damned fool, is what he is.” Runo said testily as he stalked down the Berkian docks with advisor Freya close behind. The wood creaked loudly beneath his heavy footfalls, threatening to snap under his weight until he began to climb aboard the Knarr. He was much like a bear - and behind him, walking delicately and smoothly, Freya was much like a spider.

“How did you come to know he was here?”

Runo scoffed at this. “I didn’t. Just lucky.” He said. He started to remove his cumbersome formal wear, dropping his fur cloak on the deck and dropping his weapons with a great clatter. Freya was very still and serene. She found that the best way to learn what was on Runo’s mind was to stay uncomfortably quiet and let him speak on his own terms - to encourage words or thoughts from him would only make him clam up stoically out of spite. Runo sucked in a breath through clenched teeth.

“And what the hell I’m to do now?” He threw up his hands in exasperation. “I don’t want to take him home. He’s no heir of mine. Makes me sick to think that, when I fall, I’d be succeeded by a man that abandoned his people for three years. Hell, makes me sick to think my own blood would have done such a thing.” He fumed. “What a betrayal. What an outrage. What a coward.”

Freya was unfazed as she watched Runo bellow furiously, a sight which would have left many others quaking with fright. She watched with glassy eyes and hands clasped behind her back, nodding ever so slightly.

“Before considering what you should _do_ , Runo, you should consider what you _want._ ”

Runo, fists balled up at his sides, thought for a moment.

“First thing’s first. Berk needs a proper heir, Freya. Urgently. For the good of the peoples of both our tribes. There are increasingly powerful and dangerous forces at work in this world… Our strength will be tested. I need to see my people safe… The Berkians, too. You are to see to it that Hiccup and Astrid are married.”

Freya listened obediently. “And in regards to your son?”

Runo nodded. “ _Harald_ is no longer the heir of Stormbreaker. Cowards who can’t take responsibility aren’t of my spit, let alone my blood.”

Freya betrayed a tiny quirk of emotion - the slightest curling upward of her lip. Runo continued - suddenly lowering his voice, even though there was nobody around to eavesdrop.

“Ever since he was a child, he’s been… _Different_. He always talked the strangest nonsense. Saying the Earth was round…or that the Moon commands the tides. I thought I’d never meet another man like him. But then I meet Chief Hiccup…” Harald ground his teeth together. In Hiccup, he’d seen a person so fascinatingly like Harald. Thinking in similar ways. Similarly interested in puzzles and ponderings. There was a pause, then, long enough that Freya raised her eyebrows to encourage Runo to continue. He did.

“I’ve no interest in seeing my son again. I’m going home. But you’re to see he doesn’t _interfere_.”

Freya reached to pinch her black skirt and curtseyed deeply. Her teeth were bright and white in the moonlight as she grinned, averting her gaze from the Chief with deference.

“As you wish, my Liege.”

* * *

Harald had been in no rush to repair his ship. Though he’d procured everything he needed to finish the work in the better part of a day, he had no reason to leave. He found himself quite liking the place. The clammy weather was somehow endearing. The dragons were breathtakingly beautiful in the sky. It was easy to sleep aboard his beached ship and the kind citizens often helped him hunt.

The perk that was most often on his mind, though, was the Chief.

Hiccup was such a fascinating person - the most interesting person he’d ever met. He’d never before had so many questions to ask one person, and he’d never before met someone who was so capable of making him laugh… And he’d never, _ever_ met someone who cared about his kites. The time he’d spent with Hiccup had been fun, yes - but he felt like he trusted this Chief. He admired his moral compass, his fortitude, and his good humor.

As night fell, he leaned on the bow of his ship and watched the sunset from the sandy beach, feeling wind tousle his hair. The sky darkened from its bright blue to deep shades of orange and purple - and as the inky black of night began to descend, he noticed a flickering of firelight on the mainland. At first, it was hard to notice - perhaps it was merely the last of the sunlight reflecting in strange ways off the mountains… But once twilight gave way to dusk, he was certain that something curious was happening near the Great Hall. Curiously, and with a spring in his step, he hopped from the ship and began to trudge through the sand. He came closer, terrain parting until he could see that the firelight was that from dozens of bright torches that illuminated a dense crowd of people engaged in revelry. He smiled widely, excited to see it - he wasn’t a stranger to a good party.

He clapped a passerby on the shoulder to get his attention. “You, there.” He gestured vaguely to the crowd, by now only half a mile away - and he could smell the cooking meats and stews in he wind. “What’s the occasion?”

The Viking he’d stopped smiled widely, looking in a hurry to get there. “Good news! The Chief’s finally engaged!”

The stranger continued to the event, turning away without hesitation, but Harald was frozen in place. His face was suddenly blank and his feet were planted in the dirt like tree trunks. He didn’t move for quite some time - at least, his body didn’t move. On the inside his stomach dropped, inch by inch, for many minutes. Once he finally had the energy, he turned back the way he came and walked all the way to the beach.

Repairs to the Dry Rot were completed by the morning.

* * *

_“Good morning.”_

Astrid woke Hiccup by stroking her fingers delicately across his stubbled face. Her round features were bright, but tired in the morning light as Hiccup’s eyes fluttered open. He suddenly grabbed fistfuls of blanket and pulled them over himself, rolling away from her to get warm like he was going to bed anew.

“Good morning? I’ll say ‘good morning’ when I wake up for real at noon.” He squeaked. Two birds with one stone. One, he could playfully poke at his desire to sleep in - and two, he could avoid cuddling with her.

Astrid looked away, bright expression suddenly replaced by a vacant one. It didn’t take an idiot to notice Hiccup was being somehow distant. Which was weird, because he’d proposed the night before. Did she… Have the right to be angry at him for it? She was a naturally fierce person, ready to solve problems with a good bit of tough love.

No, she didn’t have the right. That wasn’t the sensation she got from Hiccup. He was distant because… Well, he seemed so troubled. Being Chief was new to him. The responsibility was new to him. And no, a treaty had forced them to become engaged - more responsibility that he probably wasn’t ready for. His life was changing so quickly… It was natural to be overwhelmed.

“I bet you want things to slow down, huh?” She leaned in to him, whispering to be heard by the Viking that had curled up in a tight ball under a pile of blankets.

Hiccup responded with a loud and pained groaning sound. To translate from grumpy, tired Viking, Hiccup was saying - ‘Oh, Gods, you’ve hit the nail on the head’. Astrid smiled weakly.

“I’m sorry. You _should_ get some you-time in today, huh?” She encouraged quietly. “You could use the rest. And no one will be expecting us to do anything today.”

The bundle of fur blanket twitched a bit - Hiccup had silently nodded.

“Or, even better, we could get some _we_ -time in today.” Astrid suddenly smacked Hiccup with a playful fist and got a sudden grunt of pain.

And then, Hiccup was glad he was hidden under the blanket - Astrid didn’t have to see the moment he winced with guilt. He bit his thumb to stop from letting out noise - he hated to think of what an atrocious person he had been. How he’d carried on with Harald without telling him about Astrid. How he’d carried on with Astrid without telling her about Harald. He… He had to do it. He had to choose responsibility over fun. ‘True love’ was a fakery for teenagers, but now he was an adult… ‘We’ time with Astrid. That would be his day. He’d put work in, but he’d fall in love with her again. But, guilty pit in his gut, he kicked the blankets off himself. He wasn’t finished.

“That sounds great -“ He said to Astrid, rubbing his shoulder where he’d been punched - “But… there’s one thing I gotta do first.” He said, rolling out of the bed and sliding his prosthetic leg into place. “I’ll be right back, milady.”

* * *

Hiccup was surprised to see the sails of the Dry Rot in good condition, a new mast in place, and a Harald working with great difficulty to get her back into the water. Hiccup had walked to the beach rather than flying Toothless - he figured he’d needed the time to think. Rehearse what he was going to say. How he was going to say it. Harald, occupied with the task at hand, didn’t notice the Chief until he was only a dozen feet behind and he piped up to make himself known.

“You got her fixed up awful fast.”

Harald didn’t respond, but he stopped working. He’d been literally pushing at the stern of the ship to try to slide it into the water - an almost entirely fruitless endeavor with the tide where it was, but maybe in a few hours he’d have better luck. He backed away from the ship and shook out his sore hands.

“You’re a bastard, Hiccup.” Harald said, without looking his way. “Just a real class act.”

And Hiccup looked down, unable to respond, because he knew Harald was right. There was silence.

“Do you even _like_ men?” Harald finally turned, leaning against the Dry Rot and crossing his arms. His face looked flushed with color and he felt heat pricking at his cheeks as he restrained his temper. Hiccup babbled uncomfortably for a moment.

“I… I think so, yes.” He finally managed.

“Girls too, I hear.” Harald turned away again.

“…Yeah.” Hiccup said, guilty, eyes downcast. He started to pick at his own fingers. Curses. Harald had already heard. Hiccup had come to apologize, to come clean, and to let Harald down gently. What was the point, now? This was all so…

“I don’t deserve this.” Harald said.

Hiccup had rehearsed dozens of ways this conversation could have gone in his head during his walk, and he suddenly abandoned all of them, opening his mouth wide and blurting out words in a rapid, stream-of-consciousness style to Harald. He couldn’t be honest with Astrid. Something held him back. _Harald_ was the one he spoke honestly to.

“You don’t!” He spat. “But I’m not some person who plays with people, that’s not who I am! I’ve never done anything remotely _like_ this before, I didn’t even… Notice what I was doing while it was happening! And I’m just so… So tired of having to pretend to love her! So tired of no one understanding me! When no one around you understands you, you start to feel like, do you understand yourself? Maybe everyone else is right about who you are, and you’re the one who’s wrong? But then I met you and you just made me feel so-“

Harald suddenly turned in the sand, and began walking to Hiccup at full speed.

“You’re an _idiot._ ”

And then, he grabbed Hiccup by the leather belt across his chestplate, and both men pulled each other into the most passionate kiss they’d ever felt. As waves crashed loudly beside them, lips danced across each other. Harald’s tasted of sea spray and Hiccup’s tasted of smoke - hands tangled in each other’s hair and hearts stopped pumping blood and started instead pumping red-hot magma that poured into veins and made their souls boil. With eyes closed, they both saw stars and thought they were inseparable. Neither viking had felt like it was possible for their body to fit so perfectly into the arms of another.

‘True love’ wasn’t fakery for teenagers. It was as real as the sun or the moon or the wind or the ocean. It was just much, much harder to find - and rarely appeared at the right time, or under the right circumstances. That was what made it all the more fun.

Hiccup and Harald continued to hold each other after they finished their kiss. Harald’s fingers were woven tightly into Hiccup’s long hair, tugging tightly at it as he heard a whisper in his ear.

“ _What are we going to do?”_ Hiccup murmured, trembling. Harald had no answer for some time.

“We’ll find out together.” He responded, just as quietly and somberly as the Chief had.

They were still, and they breathed slowly - no longer able to deny that their souls were knotted together beyond untying.

Far in the distance, from atop a distant cliff, a spiderlike woman watched with hands clasped behind her back.


	7. Chapter 7

* * *

“I have to go back to her.”

Hiccup was still being clutched closely by Harald, feeling him breathe. Both men were smiling weakly. They were able to see past their anxieties - past the uncertainties of this situation - for just the _few moments_ required to enjoy _now_.

“I understand.” Harald said after swallowing thickly. His voice was disturbed by the fact he was tearing up, but whether from joy or sorrow or confusion Hiccup couldn’t quite tell.

“She… _She’s_ expecting me back any minute, and-“

“I said I understand.” Harald interrupted. Sincerely. He struggled to articulate his inner conflict, words tumbling from his stammering mouth slowly and reluctantly. “We need to find a way out of this. And you can’t keep lying to your… Your…”

“ _Betrothed._ ” Hiccup interrupted, suddenly feeling sickly. He released his arms from Harald’s and breathed heavily, already feeling woozy at the thought of saying something so hurtful. Harald, too, looked to pale at the word.

“Are you going to tell her?”

Hiccup clenched his teeth together. God, it would hurt. Both of them. He regret not speaking to her sooner. He regret that there was something stopping him from telling her how he felt - but now, there was no choice. It would be a truly despicable man to keep her in the dark a moment longer.

They would have to keep their betrothal. It would be a wedding not of passion, but of necessity for Berk. It was not historically unheard of - many marriages in generations past had been to secure alliances between chieftains and tribes. It would be…

“I’m so sorry I asked that.” Harald said quickly, placing a hand on Hiccup’s cheek. “I know, this must be so, so hard for you right now.” He consoled, stroking it gently and looking him deeply in the eye. “Take your time. But please, _promise me_ you won’t come speak to me again until she knows. I couldn’t bear to know she was kept in the dark a moment longer.”

“I agree.” Hiccup interrupted quickly, unable to stand the idea that Harald might think he would even consider otherwise. “I’ll… I’ll be back, bud. E-eventually.” He rubbed the back of his neck, starting to walk away with a heavy stomach. From one difficult conversation to another, Hiccup could barely believe that someday this drama might be over with. It seemed so intense. Like it would last forever.

Maybe it would.

* * *

The Berkian skies were rarely sunny. Fog, overcast weather, rain, and cool breezes were common staples of Hiccup’s home. The beaches Harald had seen on his travels, in contrast, were often sunny or temperate. Excellent places from which to view expansive blue skies and dazzlingly colorful sunsets.

Harald had climbed the mainmast of the Dry Rot, sitting - perhaps unwisely, due to its strength - on one of the long booms that stuck out across her bow. He looked out at the ocean and listened to the waves crest and crash at the sand, thinking on Hiccup - and he found he didn’t awfully mind that the view was somewhat drab.

“I love him.”

He said it quietly, into the salty breeze that pushed into his face and blew his hair askew. It made him giddy. The quiet words were carried away by that gusty wind - he tried again.

“ _I love him._ ”

The tone was this time more triumphant. A wider smile on his face. Who else had ever taken interest in his kites? In aerodynamics, or structural design, or mechanics? After all the other people he’d held a candle for… How, how on _Earth_ , had he fallen in love with this man at first sight?

He stood up straight, balancing on the beam, and gripped a thick rope to steady himself, screaming powerfully at the horizon, filling his lungs to the brim with air and wailing every last bit of it out with each proclamation. “I love him! I love him! _I love him!_ ”

He did this until he was entirely tuckered out, and then he fell back to his place, breathing heavily and laughing. It was only the sort of thing he would have done alone - so he yelped with a start when he heard a voice from behind.

“I’m glad for you.”

He stumbled, nearly falling and looking around for the source of the noise - a tall woman clad in black had somehow clambered onto the deck of his ship without him noticing. How quietly, how stealthily she must have moved to accomplish that. The idea crossed his mind for only a moment that she might be a ghost, but he knew there to be no such thing.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know anyone else was here. I was being…”

“A traitor. I quite understand.” She nodded sagely, walking closer. Her stance was widening. Her eyebrows were furrowing. Harald was searching for a response through his surprise when she spoke again.

“I notice you’re unarmed. Pitiful excuse for a Stormbreaker. You should always be moments away from crushing _anyone_ who stands in your path… Or at the very least defending yourself.”

Harald’s throat was dry. She knew his tribe. And if she knew his tribe, she knew who _he was._

“I-I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.” Harald started to say. He couldn’t stop. He was repeating himself weakly and dumbly as he saw Freya produce a shining metal dagger from her hip. She clambered swiftly up the mast, hauling herself by the rope with little difficulty. She walked down the long wooden boom, pointing her blade at him, and he backed away from her frightfully. “I ran. I’m sorry I ran. I just never fit in. I wasn't ever one of you, I --”

And then, guilty excuses for his disappearance was replaced with pitiful pleading as she drew nearer.

“You don’t have to hurt me! I’m so sorry, you don’t have to hurt me, I’ll do whatever you want!”

More desperation.

“ _Say something! You don’t have to kill me! Please! Talk to my father!”_

Seeing no other means of escape, once she was mere inches away from him, he leapt from the boom and fell twenty feet into the sand.

* * *

Hiccup pushed open the door to his home and heard her voice.

His own hut - that he shared now with Astrid, apparently - was two stories tall. The entrance held only a modest dirt floor and a fireplace, currently dead. The stairs, creaky and unreliable, lead to the bedroom upstairs where Astrid had been lounging. When she heard Hiccup enter, she cheered to greet him and bounded down to join him. She was so happy - she used a melodic, eager voice. The voice of a newly engaged woman in love, greeting her paramour. Astrid strode down the stairs slowly, smile on her face as she gazed placidly at Hiccup. His face twisted into one of discomfort and, suddenly, he looked away. Ashamed.

“You’re never going to forgive me.” He said shakily. “And… I don’t think I deserve to be forgiven. I’ve done… I’ve done wrong by you, Astrid. It’s all my fault.”

Astrid immediately dropped her joyous tone and expression and rushed to Hiccup’s side, brushing stray locks of hair out of his forehead and lovingly tugging on the braids in his hair.

“Hiccup… Hiccup, what is it?” She murred with concern. She still looked at him with those friendly eyes that made him burn with guilt. “Are you alright?”

He shook his head rapidly, with downcast eyes and a lump in his throat. It made him sound odd and choked-up. He wanted to apologize again, but it wasn’t worth it. He had to finish this.

“I think we’ve been drifting apart for so long.” He started.

And Astrid was surprisingly silent. And her facial expression didn’t change much. He looked to her for a reaction, but there was none. So, he had no choice to continue.

“Astrid, when I was a kid all those years ago when we first started out, I did love you. I promise. You meant the world to me. But… How many times since then have you really felt like I understood you? Or like you understood me?” He continued. “I feel so alone on this island. Even when I’m with you. Sometimes… Sometimes _especially_ when I’m with you.”

More silence, and more stoicism from Astrid. He sucked in another breath.

“I met someone. And… I didn’t tell you, but I should have sooner. Someone who makes me feel special. Someone who makes me feel _not lonely_. And I should have said so. I should have told you that I thought we were drifting like this a _long_ time ago. I had to… The treaty meant I _had to_ ask to marry you.”

He started to become annoyed - no, infuriated - with her silence. His stomach was knotted up, badly. It was more than he could bear, and he balled up his fists, feeling like the dread and shame would explode out of him if he was pricked with a pin.

“Do you think I didn’t know?” Astrid asked, shaking her head slowly.

She didn’t sound upset at all, and that almost made Hiccup feel worse.

“What?”

“Hiccup… I’m not an idiot. I could… Tell we weren’t too close anymore. Like you said. I mean, when there’s a big adventure keeping our attention, we’re at each other’s side. But I was starting to realize it was just the thrill of adventures like that keeping us together.”

It was true. Astrid was mature enough to see the signs. Hiccup had been awfully distant, ready to excuse himself from her company at every available opportunity. Kisses between them had felt strange and awkward, when once they had been smooth and warm. Hiccup felt her stroking his back and he let out a deep, shuddering sigh.

“Why don’t you sound upset?”

“Because I love you too much to be upset at you.”

Astrid pulled away from him to sit by the fire, patting the spot next to her to encourage him to sit.

“Don’t get me wrong. I’m disappointed. But I want what’s best for you. And if it’s not me, then I have to understand.”

Hiccup sat by her side, wiping his face with surprise and smiling a bit. He was so sorry for what he’d done - he was ready to talk with her. About everything.

They lit the fire and spoke for hours. Hiccup finally opened up to her in ways he never had before, and she opened up in turn. How he’d been so scared to upset her by being honest about his feelings. How he’d met Harald, and how he would find ways to make his failings and mistakes up to her. By the end of the night, they were close once again. Close in the way they were always meant to be - as inseparable friends.

* * *

Hiccup hadn’t shared a bed with Astrid that night. They shared breakfast, though, and it seemed they were prepared to embark on a strange new normal. A sham engagement between friends, and a secret love. Hiccup looked out to the beach as he mounted a sleepy Toothless, carrying a sack of extra food at his back - no doubt Harald would enjoy a cut of breakfast as well. Who knew what kind of horrid sea rations he must have been keeping himself to all this time.

Hiccup had been about to land on the beach when he realized the Dry Rot was no longer in its usual spot. In its place, a swath of sand pushed out of the way, showing that it had been successfully pushed back into the sea. Toothless glided slowly above as Hiccup looked down with concern, eyes narrow.

“Let’s… Let’s circle around, bud. Maybe he’s sailing around nearby.” He said, patting his dragon and directing his gaze from the beach to the shoal and the distant horizon. There was no ship to be seen. He made more and more passes over the coastline, eventually even taking to calling Harald’s name over the wind, but there was nothing.

An hour of searching and seeing nothing from above, he landed by the Dry Rot’s old resting place, pacing around and breathing heavily, frantic to find his love. Mind buzzing with fright. What could possibly have happened? Things were just about to head in the right direction. Things were just about to become happily ever after.

“Have you seen him, bud?” He asked Toothless urgently, kicking around sand. Toothless warbled sadly, lowering his head to the sand and covering his eyes. The Viking clutched his forehead in thought, trying to think of where Harald might have taken himself… When he finally noticed a scrap of orange cloth, staked into the sand below him. It fluttered in the wind. He took it in his hand, and he whimpered when he read the runes written on it in deep, jet black paint.

YOU NEED ASTRID

GOODBYE

H

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to thank Baiselyarts (@baisleyarts on Tumblr, ko-fi.com/baisley) for the beautiful commission of Harald and Hiccup provided at the beginning of the chapter. Happy ten years, How to Train your Dragon!


	8. Chapter 8

Hiccup was drunk, and the sun would be rising in an hour or two.

He'd withdrawn to his bedroom after a long night of heavy drinking. Discarded tankards and wooden cups were strewn about the living room. He began his drinking next to a roaring fire, and he drank until it devoured itself into a weak pile of embers. Toothless had murred with concern from outside as he heard the stumbling noises the viking made clambering to the bedroom.

"Idiot." He murmured to himself as he shouldered open the bedroom door, half-falling inwards and tumbling onto the hay bed. It didn't help his coordination that it was a dark, moonless night and all the candles usually lit in his room were totally extinguished. 

He was an idiot. He'd made ridiculous mistakes, fueled by infatuation with a man he barely knew. 

As he dropped onto the bed, he reached into his pocket and fished out the only object he had to remember Harald by - the orange scrap of cloth, painted with the text he'd read dozens of times. Each rune filled him with nausea. "You need Astrid," it insisted. "Goodbye", it said shortly. How could Harald have finished something so unique in so few words? How could that be?

He lay back onto his pillow, looking forlornly out to the stars through the window. To his surprise, the stars were fairly blurry. He wiped his eyes and, seeing no improvement, realized it was due to his drunkenness. 

Toothless had been left to sleep outside. On some nights, he preferred the warmth of the fire in Hiccup's living room. On hot summer nights, though, he liked to sleep under the stars - and Hiccup, in his self destructive mood, had locked the doors so his best friend wouldn't try to interfere with his malaise. The dragon had heard the discomfort from within - sickened choking noises of distress. The sounds of cups clattering off of tables and disappointed sighs in between swigs of mead. The dragon began to nose urgently at the front door.

"Stop it, bud." Hiccup said quietly. He couldn't summon the energy to speak up loud enough to actually be heard. Toothless growled more angrily - pawing and clawing at the door, pounding at it with more of his strength. Hiccup didn't want to have Toothless by his side. He didn't want to be with _anyone_ right now.

Well. Perhaps there was _one_ person he wouldn't mind having next to him.

He imagined - ignoring the pounding noises at the door - Harald sitting beside him. Comforting him. Harald would weave his fingers through Hiccup's thick brunet hair, tugging lightly at it and leaning close. "Shh, shh." He might say, burbling sweet nothings - maybe even affectionately delivered nonsense syllables - under his breath, squeezing him to make him feel better. That might be the only thing to make the world make sense right now. He'd upended his relationship with Astrid in surprisingly short order, and in the process threatened a massively important treaty. Threatened the safety of his people. Was this his destiny? To live a difficult and densely tumultuous life following the death of his father?

Now, he had no one to talk to. Valka was busy - away on business, as she was wont to do, with saving dragons. She'd spoken with Hiccup about making regular visits... But she would be gone for some time. He wondered how _she_ would react to all this. His friends - Ruff, Tuff, Fishlegs, Snotlout... They weren't close enough to him to know about this, he thought. And Astrid... He'd already bothered her enough. Toothless, the only source of potential comfort in his life right now... Was the one he was trying his hardest to push away. 

He wished he'd never found that godforsaken kite. He might never have thought about falling in love with Harald. That free spirit of a man, wandering on the breeze. Exactly the person Hiccup had wanted to be before responsibility was thrust his way. How he longed to be as relaxed and serene as a bird in flight, floating lazily in a calm ocean wind. The sunlight could be warm on his back as he drifted over the crashing waves. He could take slow, deep breaths and taste the sweet air.

It was nothing like where he was, now. His mind foggy, his head throbbing. His throat dry from strong drink, and his eyes wet from truth.

That orange kite had been such a beautiful thing.

_Orange._

With a start, Hiccup's eyes burst wider as he fumbled around for the scrap of cloth. The one with Harald's last message, hastily drawn in black paint. He brought it to his eyes, but it was too dark for him to make out the _one_ detail he wanted to. He rushed with it to the window, holding it under the starlight, squinting and looking intently. No luck. Just as quickly as he'd stumbled to the window he rushed back to the bed, tripping over his feet as he reached for Inferno, his flaming sword. He held it high above his head and, with a click and a swing, it filled the room with light. For a mere moment Hiccup was blinded. But now, the room fully illuminated, his suspicion was confirmed.

The message had been written on a scrap of cloth. An _orange_ scrap of cloth. The same orange as the beautiful kite he'd discovered days earlier. He knew it was one of Harald's closest possessions, crafted delicately over the course of many weeks. Hiccup's mouth fell open and he gasped, feeling a newfound resolve bubbling up within his chest.

Disappearing without saying goodbye - Leaving nearly no trace he had ever been there - This was not the sort of thing the Chief had thought Harald would do. But what other explanation for his disappearance would there be? He turned the scrap over in his fingers. As out of character a sudden disappearance was... He knew Harald would never, _ever_ destroy his kite. Especially not for such a cold and cruel reason, to leave this flat and emotionless message behind.

"Toothless!"

* * *

The dragon watched with curiosity and attention as Hiccup energetically fussed around him, gathering up what looked like the needed materials for a long trip. Dried food, fishing nets, fire starters and tinder, a sleeping bag, all getting tightly bound up in sacks and tied to Toothless' saddle. Hiccup spoke a mile a minute to his friend, in between wiping his eyes of tears from suddenly forgotten suffering.

"He would never _do_ that, Toothless." Hiccup finished explaining, securing the last of his cargo on Toothless' back. "He's been taken. I don't know why, or by who, but he didn't do this to me. He's out there somewhere, and I have to help."

Toothless didn't look satisfied.

"...What?"

A fierce nudge from the snout, barely knocking Hiccup off balance. He frowned. Toothless' dark form was murky, but stood out as a black void, deeper than the darkness of the night with two iridescent green eyes that betrayed disappointment.

"...I'm so sorry, bud." He said, bringing a hand up to Toothless' neck and scratching it lightly. He made direct eye contact with Toothless. "I know you care about me. You didn't want to let me... Be alone while I was hurting."

Toothless nodded, urging Hiccup to continue.

"I shouldn't have been trying to push you away, bud. You wanted to help me feel better."

Toothless growled in a hushed tone - 'one more thing you're forgetting, Hiccup'.

"And... You'll always be there for me."

Toothless licked Hiccup playfully all the way from his waist to his face, smearing a gross, slimy saliva all over him. He normally would have jumped away in disgust, but Hiccup found himself laughing hysterically. It felt good to smile, feeling that dumb dragon dripping off of him. "Thor, I'm so thankful for you, Toothless." He leapt up and hugged his friend as tightly as he could. Toothless brought a wing delicately around him in return. They shared a moment. A much needed breath of air to recollect themselves.

"We have to find him, Toothless."

The dragon seemed unconvinced, but nodded as Hiccup began to mount him.

"He'll make me happy, bud. And I know you want me happy." He pat Toothless' side as his peg leg clicked satisfyingly into place at Toothless' side, mechanics of steel bonding dragon and rider.

Toothless leapt into the sky with the slap of his tail against the ground, flying up to the dazzling night sky. Hiccup lowered the visor of his helmet as wind rushed by like a hurricane. He clutched his dragon tightly as the sun began to rise over the ocean, the barest of orange tinges hiding the dimmest stars in view to the west.

* * *

_This is Berk._

_He wasn't from here, but he seemed to fit in perfectly. And it feels a bit emptier, now that he's gone._

_I have no leads. I have no clues. I don't know who took him, or why. But I do know I'll search from the Islands of Irritability to the Strait of Scorn and beyond to find him._

_While my island is Berk, it is not my home._

_My home is at his side._

* * *

**END PART 1**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for being patient for this update. Don't forget to let me know if you like it, as it's a big motivator to keep me going. I'm going to try to write some more stuff outside of this project, and if there's any particular type of stuff you'd like to see, please let me know. Thanks so much for reading my love story. <3


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